S2E1 – The Child

Geordi is now the Chief Engineer – which seems like a big step up from Helmsman. Doctor Crusher has left to head Starfleet Medical, but she hated Wesley so she left him with us. Dr. Pulaski has taken her place, and she’s kind of written to be a female version of Bones, but without the compassion. We now have a bartender, Guinan, to serve us home spun wisdom along with our prune juice. And we are finally, FINALLY, introduced to the most important character of the series: Riker’s Beard.

And then there’s plot. Ugh. OK: Some random space light bulb decides to knock up a humanoid, and now Troi is pregnant with a space baby. She describes being asleep and having “what I can only describe as a presence” enter her, which sounds a lot like some space roofies and the University of Virginia. BOOM. Anyway, she’s keeping her Space Baby, which quickly becomes a Space Child, which accidentally cultivates a Space Plague, so he has to die. This is all as dumb as it sounds.

Non-humorous aside here: This episode is terrible – it’s a terrible idea and it’s written terribly. Troi is raped by an alien that has no concern for her emotions or her body or the safety of anyone on the ship, and aside from a SUPER brief conversation where Worf is the only one to point out this could be a security issue (hint: IT IS) this is treated like it’s a good thing. I’m just going to quote the AV Club here ( http://www.avclub.com/tvclub/star-trek-the-next-generation-the-childwhere-silen-41741 ) because I can’t say it better:


“What it translates to is: an alien hitches a ride without permission, rapes a woman, knocks her up, saddles her with grotesque body changes, attaches itself to her post-birth to gain information, endangers everyone on board the ship with its thoughtless selfishness, and then orchestrates an exit in the most emotionally manipulative fashion possible by forcing its “mother” to witness the death of her child. That’s not how it’s presented, of course. It’s presented as a joyous life experience, but no amount of tears and lies make this anything less than a travesty.”


S1E25 – The Neutral Zone

Speaking of bad placing, how is this the season finale?

This is a very serious episode dealing with possible Romulan encroachment in the Neutral Zone and the outright destruction of multiple outposts (I see you, vague foreshadowing). You know what would make a super awesome B story? Why, a wacky fish-out-of-water tale of three humans who were cryogenically frozen and now find themselves IN THE FUTURE!!!, complete with comical musical cues! Golly gee, that southern boy sure do talk funny! And women, they are SO emotional when they realize everyone they have ever known and loved is dead! But at least we have the Captain of American Industry there to let all us enlightened space folk know our place. Hyuck hyack!

S1E24 – Conspiracy

I’ve watched this episode three times and all I seem to remember is Remmick’s head exploding. There’s “something wrong” with the highest echelons of Star Fleet and I feel like this episode would have been awesome if it was part of a multi-story arc, but to throw it in, randomly, with little or no build up, and sandwich it between “I once stood a lady up in Paris” and “Oh, yeah, we haven’t really SEEN the Romulans” seems like bad placing.

S1E23 – We’ll Always Have Paris

The Enterprise has déjà vu. No, it’s not a time loop – the moment only repeats once. And since they mention it spread out to everything in the vicinity I wonder if it just keeps going, across the galaxy, making everyone everywhere have déjà vu, or if it dissipates, and do, like, dogs get déjà vu? I have already put way more thought in to this than the writers did.